Something we all need to hear...
Words are powerful. What we say matters. To ourselves and to other people.
But have you ever noticed how easy it is to talk about your dreams?
I am guilty of this too. I love talking about big ideas, future plans, and the exciting things I want to build. I think part of me believes other people will be just as excited about it as I am.
Over the years, I have learned something the hard way.
I once heard that when you go around telling people what you are going to do, your brain gets the same dopamine hit as if you already did it. I do not know if that is scientifically true, but it scared me when I heard it. Because it felt true.
You talk about the plan.
You feel good.
But nothing actually changes.
I realized I had been doing this with family and friends. I would tell them about a new project, a new idea, a new direction. And when they did not react the way I expected, I got offended. I wanted encouragement. I wanted excitement. I wanted validation.
Instead, I felt resistance.
I even convinced myself that some people wanted me to fail. I could see it in their eyes, or at least I thought I could. And that feeling bothered me more than I care to admit.
Years later, I understand what was really happening.
It was not their vision. It was mine.
I noticed this clearly during my comeback from Europe. I was almost 30 years old and trying to fight my way back to the NHL. I knew who I was as a player, and I knew how I needed to reinvent myself to survive.
I remember telling an ECHL coach exactly how it was going to go. I told him I would play big minutes in the Coast on the 1st or 2nd line, scoring and making plays, but also checking, fighting, and doing whatever it took. I told him I would be a 3rd line banger in the AHL, fighting everyone. I told him that when I reached the NHL, I would play three minutes a night and make them count with hits, fights, and momentum.
I saw the vision.
No matter what league I played in, I'd play the same way.
Smash. Fight. Repeat.
That's what I told him. I thought he'd be fired up!!
But I could hear it in his voice.
He did not believe me.
He brushed me off. He did not give me a shot.
At the time, that made me angry. I knew I was telling the truth. I knew my path. I knew what I was capable of.
And eventually, I did exactly what I said I would do.
But here is the lesson I learned much later.
I did not need him to believe me.
I did not need to convince anyone.
I just needed to do the work.
Looking back, I talked too much. I explained too much. I tried to sell my vision to people who were not meant to carry it.
The only thing that mattered was that I backed it up.
The real danger is not talking about your plans. The real danger is talking about them and never following through.
I have done that too. More times than I would like to admit.
So let me ask you something.
Is there something you have been talking about for months?
Years?
Maybe even decades?
Have you been feeding off the feeling of talking about it instead of taking the next step?
This week, forget the whole roadmap. Forget the big picture. Just focus on the next logical step. The very next action.
I am taking mine this week.
No announcements.
No explanations.
Just work.
Who will take the next step with me?
Bobby Robins, savage motivator, ex hockey pro, writer for Wraparound.